Things are not going to always go the way that we expect/want them to go. That is just a fact that we have to face. There are things/situations that we have no control over. There are some things that we can do nothing about. But we do get to have full control over how we handle the disappointment and what we do with it/how we let it affect us.

If we have done all that we could/should do in the situation then we have to accept that it didn’t work out for some reason that we may never know. Trust that it happened for a reason that will end up being in our best interest somehow. And remember that God works all things out for the good of those whom love him.

Then take the time to look at the whole situation from a outward view -taking your personal feelings and opinions out of it- and see if there is a lesson that can be learned. Ask yourself if there is anything that you could have done differently/ better. If you had negative feelings, ask yourself what you felt and why it made you have those feelings (You may discover that you had feelings that were covering other feelings up so you have to ask yourself why you felt that way until you get to the real reason). What can you learn from the situation to benefit you in the future? How can you handle the situation better next time? What positive influence can you take from the experience? No matter how bad a situation may have been there is usually something that we can learn from it once we don’t have feelings standing in the way.

Even though we will have no choice but to be disappointed or let down from time to time, we do get to decide to not let it have a negative impact on us. We get to choose if we are going to keep our peace and joy or if we are going to let something or someone take it from us. People may be able to control outward things but they cannot control our inner being unless we allow them to.

If we experience a lot of disappointment it can affect the amount of hope that we have and cause us to look at disappointments through a negative lens. We may even have got to the point of creating the mindset of “if I don’t expect anything to happen then I won’t be disappointed when it doesn’t” and that is a terrible way to live. That kind of mindset causes us to block out any hope for a better tomorrow or future. It makes life very bleak and grim. It steals our joy and takes our peace. I developed that mindset in my early teenage years and trust me when I say that life was very gloomy.

But when we accept the fact that things are not always going to go the way that we want them to go, trust that everything happens for a reason, and trust God to bring something good out of it, something shifts inside of us. We are able to take the disappointment without attaching personal feelings to it. We can see it as a learning opportunity of some sort, rather it be a lesson to learn, a way to grow in some area, More trust in God, or believe for a better opportunity in the future.

Of course we would all love for everything to go the way that we want them to go all of the time. But the reality is that it won’t. And the good news is that we don’t have to let it have a negative impact on us. I applied the same principles that I have spoke about today and it made a great change in me. I was able to go from always expecting something bad to happen or not expecting anything at all -which is hopelessness- to looking forward to something working out and even when it doesn’t I take it as a learning opportunity with joy. If I was able to go from where I was in this area I know that it is possible for you too. It will take time and you will have to put forth the effort of correcting your mindset but if you keep at it you will begin to notice a shift in yourself. Pray that the Holy Spirit help you and keep at it, refusing to let disappointment take away the hope for a better tomorrow.